Next to drugs and sex, independence for your child is probably one of the things you fear most as a parent. It means your child, whose safety and well-being mean everything to you, is suddenly out in the world (or even sometimes at home) learning to make decisions on his or her own. It's tricky. You must learn how to go against your instincts and encourage this newfound independence. And to top it off, you must still enforce boundaries for tweens, who suddenly know it all and can do it all. It's a fine line, but learning to walk it will benefit your child's self-esteem and your sanity.
Setting (and Moving) Boundaries
- When allowing your tweens out on their own, start with test runs.
- Make sure you always know where they are and who they're with.
- Make sure you are consistent in applying boundaries but can be flexible enough to adjust them.
- Accept that tweens can get angry when their boundaries are restricted.